I spent the weekend with my family. (We went kayaking on a lake + out for dinner at the beach for my dad’s birthday.)
The people around me are starting to notice my decreased anxiety.
My family was worried about taking me to multiple different places in one day, driving a lot, lots of activities, etc., and they gave me an out (really sweet), but I was totally fine.
(Last year, I had a panic attack before kayaking in my own town (at walking distance), and I ended up cancelling everything after crying on the balcony; just for comparison.)
I’m still exhausted after 2 days of socialising (the sugar challenge doesn’t cure introversion, as it turns out), but I had such a good time!
Again, it could be many things, but – regardless of the cause – this feels like a major breakthrough, and I’m really happy!
Going places and doing things no longer feels like I’m being driven to my execution.
Can you imagine the possibilities?
Anyway – despite the challenges of the past month, it did exactly what I hoped it would:
My anxiety is greatly, miraculously reduced.
As for the other things I promised I’d look out for:
I might have expected too much here. My depressive episodes are often cyclical, circumstantial, and erratic. (As other folks with ADHD might understand.) I’ve been happy more often in the past month (the sudden absence of anxiety will do that to ya), but I also need to accept that losing my grandfather has been really fucking hard, and it’s going to take a while before I’m truly okay.
That said, I’m not unhappy.
As far as I can tell, there is absolutely no impact here. Nothing has changed. This is very much in line with the expectations: sugar might make kids hyperactive, but it absolutely does not cause ADHD, and ADHD will not disappear when the sugar does.
In surprising mental health,